Over the years I have struggled with my belief in Christ. I don’t regret the struggle because it has allowed me to more deeply understand the core of my belief. In the same way a teacher challenges a student to learn, we are to take the challenges of this world and turn them over to Christ, our teacher, who is at our side constantly reassuring us. Through this process, our soul finds rest, our mind becomes at ease, and our struggle subsides. Further, we are called to use our individual struggles and what we are taught as a lesson for others to see; this is the great commission that Christ calls each of us to proclaim.
My Struggle, My Teacher
My struggle included a series of difficult questions that I have asked myself over the years: Is my belief in God based on assumptions or is it based on sound wisdom? Am I looking only at a small piece of the puzzle? Am I weak minded? Am I just looking for something to “make me feel good” and this is why I believe. Am I naive? Was I brainwashed by my parents to believe in God? Is my brain capable of considering the fact the when I die I will go into oblivion, so my belief in God is a mental coping mechanism? Am I just plain stupid? These are very difficult questions, but fair questions nonetheless.
After leaving home as a young man, the church became unimportant to me, so, no, I was not brainwashed by my parents; if they did brainwash me, it didn’t last very long! I do not consider myself weak-minded either, in fact, I wish I could think less as I tend to drain myself with over thinking. I tend to think way too much and analyze all the options. So, no, I am not weak-minded. Do I believe in God just to “feel good”? No, I can feel good doing many other things; these are called hobbies. Have I considered that God does not exist? Yes, numerous times. To be honest, it would be easier for me to not believe in God because then the struggle can be avoided. Believing requires far more effort than not believing.
So why am I compelled to believe? I can’t prove God exists, so is this reason to justify walking away from God? No, because in the Gospel we are taught that belief is not to be based on proof, but on a commitment towards Jesus Christ. God cannot be seen? But we are taught that God reveals himself through His creation. I’ve seen the Grand Canyon and I was in awe of the creation of such a vast void in the earth that I witnessed an awesome display of God’s mighty handiwork.
The Father Revealed in the Son
At that time Jesus answered and said, “I thank You, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and prudent and have revealed them to babes. Even so, Father, for so it seemed good in Your sight. All things have been delivered to Me by My Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father. Nor does anyone know the Father except the Son, and the one to whom the Son wills to reveal Him. Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Christ uses the word, “babe” in the above verses. Why did Jesus use the word, “babe”? Could it be because a baby is not burdened with over thinking. A baby hasn’t lived long enough to be corrupted by prejudices. A baby’s soul is not burdened with preconceived human notions, their soul has no pride, their soul has no concern for the future; a baby’s soul is in the immediate unhindered “now”.
When a baby is hungry, it cries; the infant doesn’t care who feeds it, all the baby knows is it is hungry. When a baby is tired, it cries; the infant doesn’t care where they lay their head, it just desires rest. When a baby thirsts, it suckles and is at peace. A baby holds no judgement towards the one who is holding it; the baby is comforted and returns a smile as a sign of peace. An infant is innocent in spirit and only desires comfort from the one who loves it.
Christ is teaching us to be more like a babe. We are to let go of all of our burdens of this world and to be innocent in spirit. We are to find comfort in Christ, because if we do not, then our struggles will divert us away from Christ. As we shed the worries of the world, we will be free to experience a core desire that compels a human spirit to be attracted to all that is good; an unexplainable undeniable love for Christ. This attraction goes beyond a worldly logic system and is so profound that we do not want to live life without Christ; and it is through this our soul finds rest. We are joined to Christ through the Holy Spirit in a shared Love for each other.
Please, my brothers and sisters in Christ, let the burdens of this world go. Allow the spirit give your soul rest so that you may be comforted in knowing that all is well.